ACA Blog

Neale Donald Walsch said, “Life begins at the end of your comfort zone”. This quote is plastered on my refrigerator as a daily reminder of where I’ve been and where I’m going.

When I was born there were three Warren Corson’s in the same town; my Grampy moved away a few years later leaving two in town and one in Maine. When I was a teen my son was born, making four Warren’s, three of which lived in the same house for about a decade; now there are only two. Grampy died a few years ago, I keep one of the brass bullet cases from his military funeral. My dad passed last September a matter of days before his birthday. He never saw retirement age.

It was going to be a tough case. During intake, the client had been particularly resistant to any sort of disclosure. To be honest, given his tight-lipped demeanor, I was not really sure why he sought therapy. His unwillingness to do more than moan and just sit there expressionless, near-catatonic, dead to the world, made me believe something was not as it seemed and there were deeper issues at play.

It all began with labor pains and a drive through a severe snowstorm on New Years Eve of 2008. I went with my husband to the hospital and was admitted to begin the most extraordinary 36 hours of my life. I endured more than I ever thought possible and tapped into a well of strength within myself I did not know existed. I was pushed past any limit I had previously envisioned for myself. It was the most incredible and powerful I have ever felt before in my life.

I’ve always wanted to paint a room, but I’ve never painted a room in my life. I think about the painting the ceiling first and think, “what if I get it just right and then mess it up when I do the walls?” I think about painting the walls first and think, “what if I get these just right and then ruin it when I paint the ceiling?” As a result, I’ve painted the mantle. I’ve painted a deck. I’ve admired other people’s beautifully painted rooms. But I’ve still never painted a room in my life.

Instead of resolutions I encourage clients to establish goals. While resolutions are blanket statements delivered to the universe with no plan of action, no reference and no structure of measurement, SMART goals are Specific, Measureable, Attainable, Realistic and Time bound. Let's examine each component.

In my most recent work with a 6 year old girl who has all the signs and symptoms of PTSD, I’ve recently been reminded of the power of feeling. Many adults in this child’s world view the times when she experiences a trauma trigger as ‘bad behavior’. It was on one of these days when her grandmother brought her to session carrying the behavior plan which she had been given at school. Grandma took a few minutes to explain the new behavior plan to me, and during this time I observed my client’s mood change from excited and happy to embarrassed, as she covered her face and began to cry softly.

[caption id="attachment_4859" align="alignleft" width="150" caption="Jennifer Bingaman"][/caption] I decided to become a counselor about three years ago. I was in the infancy of a new chapter in my life, that chapter being entitled “Happiness”. I had worked my way out of a deep depression through a year of therapy and I was beginning to see the world aglow. Everything seemed new and I found the landscape of my mind to be one that was constantly evolving and exciting. Being happy was the most thrilling adventure I had embarked on yet in my life.

In yoga and in life, the edge is that place within us where we can comfortably breathe while in a posture, situation or in any unpleasant moment. It is the healthy balance between avoidance – backing away at the first sign of discomfort or the forcing, unkind approach where we push through the pain – “grin and bear it”. The edge can be imagined as a threshold – a passage to be entered into and traveled through. We create edges to survive as necessary boundaries between what seems as unbearable pain and when ready, we dissolve them. We can become stuck in avoidance and hold onto fear or whatever is perceived as safe.

Why have we decided to follow the path to become counselors? We, as counselors-in-training, are often asked this question. At different times I’ve come up with various responses. Another apt question is: what are we going to do with our counseling education and subsequent career? I have realized over the past few months how important social advocacy is to me and that I intend it to be the cornerstone of my counseling pursuits.