Susan Jennifer Polese

The year before last my husband and I began a gutsy tradition – gutsy if you were brought up in the Roman Catholic faith that is, as we both were – we decided to forgo celebrating Easter. Yes, out of the clear, blue sky we pulled a three-sixty and began welcoming that celebrated spring holiday just as any other day.

Whatever our theoretical leanings as counselors acting as our authentic-selves and being in the present with our clients is essential. This is taught in school, experienced in internship, and is reinforced in supervision. It is expected in agency work as well as private practice. This state of being for helping professionals is ethical and appropriate. No matter where we are in our training or careers, counselors aspire to this – be there with the client.

My mother passed away on a warm evening late last May. She left this earth in the manner of her choice; at home, surrounded by her loving family. My beautiful mom – my father’s wife of sixty-two years and my daughter’s grandma - was gone.

I was clearly uncomfortable and clearly trying to hide it. As a newly certified life coach working with a married couple in crisis I sat with them in my office resisting the urge to wring my hands. I periodically nodded with empathy, peppering my interaction with encouragers. Was the temperature in the room rising? Or was it just me?