With the completion of my Internship came many mixed emotions. There is of course the extreme relief to reclaim a little of my time and energy back in my personal life. I would be lying if I said that I will miss the 2am dates with an assignment after the babies are dreaming. However, there are parts that are difficult to let go of. The clients I have worked with all these months are now no longer going to be a part of my weekly life.
I have seen some of them come so very far and I am so very proud of what they have accomplished. There are those that it pains me to have to leave without care due to financial limitations. However, I have to try and remember that I did the best I could for as long as I could and it is time to head on to the next phase in my career. I can only hope the tools I tried to give them will serve them well as they move on, hopefully to healthier lives.
This experience has me thinking a lot about the idea of letting go. Severing a relationship whether it be in our professional or personal lives is always difficult. In the past I admittedly was stuck in many relationships, romantic and otherwise, where I just held on because I did not know how to break free from an unhealthy bond. How do you walk away from someone who is still so deeply in need of you? I was so worried about the happiness of the other person that I lost sight of what made me light up inside. It became a pattern that no matter how I was treated, I held on due to a mixture of loyalty and fear of letting go.
After many years of reflection, questioning and soul seeking, I came to understand that for me the answer was to find the courage to let go when the time was right. This can be for both negative and positive reasons. It is hardly ever easy to do. We tend to be creatures who crave the nostalgia brought on by a relationship we have had for a long time, good or bad.
I believe the greatest lesson I have learned on this topic is to not be afraid of my part in someone else’s story being “over.” There are times when letting go will seem impossible but sometimes that is exactly when we should allow the other person to become what they need to be. In my professional life I know there will be many more times where I feel a sadness to see a client leave before they are ready. However, there is always the hope that they will find their way to health and light through another path.
Nicole Michaud is a Counselor in training in Central Connecticut. She is also the voice behind the cooking Blog MyLoveForCooking.com