The other day I had a resident in our drug treatment program approach me and thank me for spending so much of my time at the facility. Without thinking and answering quite honestly, I said, “I’m happy to be here.”
He raised his eyebrows and said, “Really?”

“Yes,” I said. “Once you figure out what you want to do with your life, you’re kind of ready to start doing it.”
He responded resolutely and said, “I definitely know what you mean.”
The client I was speaking with has been in recovery for months. I know he has been eager to leave treatment and begin working at his recovery outside our walls. I wasn’t surprised by his answer.

On the drive home from work, I felt exhausted. The idea of going home and making myself dinner seemed impossible. Just doing anything besides the basics of throwing on pajamas and going to sleep was out of the question.

Then, as I sat on my couch finding myself unable to climb the stairs to go to my bedroom for said pajamas and sleep, I began contemplating the recommendations we give clients when they’re eager to get out of the center and get on with their lives. We know if they rush their recovery and get thrown right back into their system, they’ll likely relapse. It’s a lot of similar stress responsible for motivating them to use in the first place. We tell them to practice things they learned in treatment. Things like mindfulness, deep breathing, journaling, and avoiding triggers.

So back to the whole couch thing, I really started wondering if I should be taking the advice we are recommending for our clients. I mean, I’m certainly not journaling, breathing deeply, or practicing mindfulness. I’m trying to survive internship here! I don’t have time for any stinking mindfulness…

Then, it hit me. We don’t recommend addicts use these tactics because they need them more than others do. We recommend these things because they are healthy coping mechanisms for life. They are integral pieces to the fabric of our wellness and we are generally lost in life unless we know how to let off a little steam. This is why addicts use. They don’t know how to cope with life. Upon reflection of my own body melting into my couch and the grumbling in my stomach, I wasn’t setting myself up to cope with my life much better.

So, I’m developing a wellness plan for the next seven months while I truck through this whole internship thing. In addicts, we call it relapse. In counselors, we call it burnout. Either way, wellness is the way to prevent it. There will be deep breathing, there will be meditation, and there will be more journaling about my experience. In seven months, I plan to be standing in my cap and gown relaxed and ready instead of ragged and beaten.

Jennifer Bingaman is a counselor-in-training and freelance writer. She blogs about her experiences as a client and a counselor with a few life musings thrown into the mix at http://www.thepursuitofsassiness.com/.